Happiness Tip - Quit Arguing

There are some people who really love to argue. If you are one of those, there's probably not much I can do for you. Do what works for you and on you go.

What I can tell you is that most people want to be around others who are supportive and easy to be around. If you are those two things, there will be a larger number of people who enjoy your company and want to be around you. In my experience, more people enjoying spending time with you generally leads to a happier life.

In addition to that, here are a few other things to consider.

• Arguing implies an effort to win; questioning implies an effort to learn. I used to love political arguments. I loved to be right. After maybe 30 years of being an often-victorious political arguer (in my mind, at least), it occurred to me that I often felt good about myself, but I was almost never really changing anyone's mind, and I was missing opportunities to learn, understand, and connect. Today, I have an awful lot of friends with whom I disagree on pretty much every major issue of the day; I think this is because a few years ago I decided to focus on learning from them, and made it a rule to never argue (a rule I sometimes break, but mostly not). Today, I am so much happier about my friendships, and I am learning so much more from them.
• For the most part, people hate to be told they are wrong. In the end, there is just no way around that. On the other hand, people mostly like to share what they know and explain their opinions. If you want more people to enjoy the time they spend with you, this might be a good thing to remember.
• Arguing is stressful; nobody ever had a heart attack from asking questions. That's just something to think about.

As you can see, I come from a very particular perspective -- more people like people who are pleasant and supportive;  it is better to have more people who like you in your life; and learning from others is better than getting them to agree with you. Not everyone will agree with this, but for most people, living with these principles will lead to a happier life. That is what I wish for you.